A classicist who spent fifteen years translating ancient Greek has decided that a $250 million science fiction film fails to meet the narrative standards of texts written before the invention of electricity. The verdict is in: Nolan’s latest lacks the poetic gravitas of the Odyssey. Film critics have stopped responding to emails.
Dr. Margaret Voss, whose translation of Homer won exactly zero Golden Globes because it’s a book, published a 4,000-word essay comparing the film’s three-act structure to the “lazy, morally bankrupt storytelling” of contemporary blockbusters. She noted that Nolan’s protagonist lacks the archetypal depth of Odysseus. She did not mention that Odysseus is fictional and also not a real person whose character arc anyone can verify.
Why would someone trained in Homeric meter critique a film made with IMAX cameras and practical explosions? Because the internet exists now, and everyone with a published opinion believes their field of expertise scales infinitely outward.
The film has grossed $890 million worldwide. Voss’s essay has been read by approximately twelve people, nine of whom are related to her. The studio’s response was a single tweet: “thanks for watching.” Nolan himself has not acknowledged the review, which is the only dignified thing anyone involved in this situation has done.